A little knowledge is dangerous!
Check in with yourself
How am I?
What is my body doing?
What are my thoughts doing?
What emotions am I having?
What do I need right now?
Where am I in relation to this present moment?
Years ago on the lecture circuit I talked at conferences and events about the use of powerful questions. I received a lot of great feedback on my presentation. As time went on people would approach me to tell me how they were using the tools I gave them. After hearing their stories, I eventually made the conscious decision to stop giving the powerful questions talk. Despite explicit explanation of what not to do, I found people were misusing powerful questions. Questions misused became interrogation. Frequently using questions as a way to exert power or escape responsibility. The underlying cause was employing the use of powerful questions without taking the time and discipline to master the tool. In Nature-based coaching mastery of powerful questions is evident by how often it is not used. A single question may take hours to form. A question is used to create space, not to fill space. A good question will linger on, often well beyond the coaching session. Now, when I talk about powerful questions, I focus on the importance of listening not asking.
Some not so powerful questions to help to create space:
What do you see? (Observation)
What could you do? (Possibilities - in & out of the box)
What will you do? (take Action)
What are you experiencing? (Being in the moment)
Where would you like to take the conversation (Agency)
Questions come in a wide variety of forms including powerful questions. I am a big fan of powerful questions used well. They are a tool to use. It is our responsibility to know how and when to use them.
Before falling back on the coaching tool of powerful questions ask:
What is the purpose of the question being asked?
Not all questions are coaching questions.
Will this question expand or diminish thinking?
It is better to share observations instead of a question that could derail a deeper exploration?
Is this question driving an (your) agenda?
What is behind your inquiry?
Does this question imply there is a right answer?
The need to have the answer is a limiting belief.
Does this question generate connection or separation?
How can you expand and/or contract the conversation without asking a question?
A Nature-based coach limits but does not abandon the use of powerful questions. There is a delicate balance. Questions are used sparingly like a seasoning, mixing and blending the right quantity to enhance the pallet. Or to tease out an undertone. Questions can become overpowering. The wrong line of questioning can ruin the moment - recover is another skill to practice. Through practice and experience we learn when to question. Less is more. Sprinkled into conversations the right use of questions are indeed a powerful tool. A strategically placed question may go unnoticed by the client as it seeps into the soil working its magic over time.
Listening to nature we find source materials surround us. Nature continually offers opportunity for curiosity. Understanding how to flow with what nature is freely providing is where the Nature-based coach finds the balance to work with nature in service of the client.